“Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one." (Matthew 6: 9-13)
"Give us today our daily bread." I don't know about you, but I've typically read this with an absolutely literal bent. I've always thought of this statement as dealing simply with my daily nutrition. Lately, though, I've come to look at it in a broader sense. My daily bread is not always what I need to put on my table to feed my family. Sometimes what I need for my fortification is encouragement. Or strength. Or courage. Or joy.
You see, this summer I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer. This wasn't supposed to happen to me. Not yet, anyway. I am 39, and I have two young daughters. I'm at the busiest time in my life, and I can't afford to be sick. Not like this. Not now. I have had surgery to remove my tumor, along with lymph nodes which were also cancerous, and have just begun my chemotherapy regimen. The first of six treatments. After that, I will face radiation, and hormone therapy. I have a long, hard road ahead. So far, I've suffered no more than reduced mobility from my surgery, and minor fatigue from my chemo, but I know it will get worse.
And yet, God has consistently supplied me with my daily bread. Or perhaps, more accurately, my daily manna.
14 After the dew had gone, the desert was covered with thin flakes that looked like frost. 15 The people had never seen anything like this, and they started asking each other, “What is it?” Moses answered, “This is the bread that the Lord has given you to eat. 16 And he orders you to gather about two quarts for each person in your family—that should be more than enough.” 17 They did as they were told. Some gathered more and some gathered less, 18 according to their needs, and none was left over. 19 Moses told them not to keep any overnight. 31 The Israelites called the bread manna. It was white like coriander seed and delicious as wafers made with honey. (Exodus 16: 14-19, 31)Like the manna in the Exodus story, it comes mysteriously, miraculously, not through the labor of my own hands or by my own planning. And it is always just enough for that particular need. On an afternoon when we discovered our bank account was nearly empty, the day after I had had a painful procedure, a friend showed up with a meal, not even knowing we had a need. We were given a gift card to a gas station for precisely the amount it takes to fill my car. We were gifted with a check, unasked for, that was the precise amount needed for a particular need. And those are only examples of material manna.
On the days when I feel afraid, or discouraged, or alone, or sad, or worth less because I can do less, God sends me a perfect word in a song, a Scripture, a phone call, or a card from a friend. This, too, is manna, but it is spiritual manna, and it is always just enough for the day. When I fail to seek His manna and expect to hold on to yesterday's, like the manna in the wilderness, it sours, or fails to hold the same meaning for me. Each day I need a new piece of manna. Each day I must seek Him out, and look for what He has for me for that day.
People ask me how I can stay so positive, even joyful, in the midst of my illness. My answer? My God is a God of enough. There is always enough joy, enough hope, enough strength, enough food, enough provision, enough love. And, to quote Mary Poppins, "Enough is as good as a feast."
So, wherever you find yourself, whatever struggles you find yourself in, search for God. Seek His manna. Feast on whatever "enough" God has for you. God has promised that you will be able to find Him. "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13)
