The Ordinary Rules of Courtesy

"Fascist!"
"Socialist!"

"Greedy pig!"
"Lazy bum!"

"Warmonger!"
"Coward!"

"Hater!"
"Sinner!"

Shall I continue?   For whatever reason, disagreements seem to end with name calling more often than not, both in the media, and in on-line debates.  I keep hearing people say that people just need to be more tolerant of other people.  Personally, I think that what we need instead is a lesson in what Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. called "the ordinary rules of courtesy."

In 1963, during the Civil Rights movement, anyone who wanted to march with Dr. King was required to sign a commitment card, which contained the "Ten Commandments of Non-Violence."  I think in our current debates, we would do well to remember in particular numbers 3, 6, and 8, which are:

3. Walk and talk in the manner of love, for God is love.

6. Observe with both friend and foe the ordinary rules of courtesy.

8. Refrain from the violence of fist, tongue, or heart.

We have forgotten how to respectfully disagree.  If you do not agree with me you must be stupid, brainwashed, intolerant, judging, or a hater.  We like to claim our First Amendment Right to say and believe whatever we want, but get our knickers in a knot when someone else claims that same right in a point contrary to our own.

When my rather "Christian Conservative" values come out, I am reminded by those who disagree to go back to Matthew 7:1a, which says,  “Do not judge..."  Apparently, this means I am not to say that I think someone or something is wrong.  However, the passage goes on to say:

³ “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵ You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

This implies that there is a humble, respectful, right way to point out someone's error - a correct way to judge.  Consider also Galatians 6:1, which says, "Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently."

This sent me on a bit of a hunt. 

First of all, I decided to look up what "judge" means.  According to Merriam-Webster, to judge is "to form an opinion about through careful weighing of evidence and testing of premises," or "to form an estimate or evaluation of."   So, based on that, along with the etymology of the word, that can't be what Jesus is saying in this oft-quoted passage from Matthew.

Next, I turned to the Amplified Bible, to see how that translation would treat the text in question.  It reads, "Do not judge and criticize and condemn others, so that you may not be judged and criticized and condemned yourselves."

The nuance shown in this translation led me to believe that the original word used was not as straight-forward as the English "judge", so I went hunting for an on-line commentary.  BibleTools.org had this insight: "Some cite Matthew 7:1 as proof that we should do no judging whatsoever: "Judge not, that you be not judged." Here, the Greek word for "judge" is krino, meaning to condemn, avenge, damn, sentence, or levy a punishment."

In other words, if you disagree, do so respectfully without condemning or being harshly critical.  And allow others to disagree with you, observing the common rules of courtesy with friend and enemy alike.